Shoe mystery

Two days ago I realized why my toes hurt:  my shoes are too small.  All of them.  By a lot -- my toes are actually kind of bruised from being jammed in there too tightly.  How did I fail to notice this?  Are my toes the proverbial frog in the boiling water?  It can't have happened overnight.

And why did it happen?  I have been the same shoe size for years - decades, I think.  I wonder if it is a result of the deep-tissue massage I've been getting; she does work on my feet (as well as everything else), and maybe I am standing differently.  I like this theory better than the other one I can think of, which is that it's part of getting older.  Ugh to that.  Maybe aliens switched all my shoes with Martian equivalents.  Maybe the gravity is greater in Seattle and has caused my feet to spread.  Maybe my hands are bigger too and I haven't noticed because I don't wear tight gloves.

It's phenomenally inconvenient.  Every shoe I own hurts my feet.  Except, conveniently, my Sorel snow boots, which I can actually wear with good reason at the moment.  They are supposed to have room for thick winter socks and now don't, but I'll take what I can get.