The broom is upstairs.

Jordan and Aaron and I were all cooking together in the kitchen, and Aaron spilled the salt.

Aaron: Argh!
Me: Whoops! The broom is upstairs.
Aaron: All the way upstairs?
Me: A wet washcloth is another option.
Jordan, smiling: I notice that you only said the useful part.
Me: What?
Jordan: You didn't say, "Clean that up." You only said the part that is actually helpful, like where the broom is. I appreciate that.

Yahoo! He noticed!!

Backstory: Long before I had kids who could talk, I read "How To Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk." This is the best parenting book I've ever read (and I've read a lot), as well as a darned good book for just human interaction broadly construed. One of their suggestions is: Instead of giving orders, offer helpful information. This respects people's intelligence and autonomy. When there is a spill, duh, we all know it needs be cleaned up. To start giving orders ("Clean that up!") introduces a pointless power dynamic, creating resentment and resistance. Instead, just offer information that the person might not have, or might be forgetting in the mini-chaos of the moment: "The broom is upstairs." For sure, this also sends implicit messages along the lines of "You know that I know that you know that it's your responsibility to clean that up," and that is fine. It's true. It is my goal to say things that are true.

How great is it when your teenager approvingly notices a parenting strategy you have been cultivating since he was born? I am so happy!