Hamburger Helper

I was not about to eat Hamburger Helper, anyway, but now that I have looked at the ingredients (because of a conversation with a friend) I am even more specifically turned off. First of all, there are 27 or more of them, depending how you count. Corn is behind much of what's there: not only the obvious (corn starch) but also things like maltodextrin (a thickener) and dextrose (a sugar). There's MSG, and two other chemical flavor enhancers that work only in the presence of MSG (disodium guanylate and disodium inosinate), and BHA which is a petrochemical, and partially hydrogenated soybean oil which is the source of trans fats. None of this surprises me. But here is the thing that I learned which I had not known: The hydrolyzed soy protein, which sounds unexceptional to me (just soy, right?), is created by boiling the soy in a strong acid (sulfuric or hydrochloric), then neutralizing it with a base. The process creates MSG, among other things, thus providing a way to incorporate MSG without having to show it in the ingredient list. What am I eating? Oh, right: I don't eat Hamburger Helper.

Except that I do. The veggie sausages that my kids both love have many of the same ingredients as the #@!! Hamburger Helper. Again with the corn and soy chemical derivatives, the hydrolyzed protein, and the flavor enhancers that only work in combination with MSG. This time the MSG is not in the ingredient list, only hidden in the hydrolysis process -- but you know it's there, because without it the disodium guanylate and disodium inosinate wouldn't perform their function. Morningstar Farms is owned by Kellogg. We have been wolfing this stuff down daily for years, lulled by the cute natural-foods-theme packaging and the innocent Nutrition Facts, but it's all marketing. There's nothing natural about it.

I can't exactly be snobby about the one and still eat the other, now can I?